Dear Julie,

I am new to this site... I have learned and grown so much through great pain after a marriage break-up. One thing which seems to be an important theme in my growth has to do with being so open that I have lost my sense of self for much of my life. When I am around strong people, energies or beings, I have been a sponge and become very lost. I am working hard on this and have made great progress, however I still find myself reeling in confusion at times... During church works, I often attract beings who are in great pain, feel unloved, unlovable, can't trust anyone, and don't know how to find the light. I realize they resonate with me somehow, and I pray to fully love myself. Most recently, I had an experience outside of the church. This has not happened to me before, and I didn't realize it for 2 weeks. Our family went to Death Valley for Thanksgiving and I'm sure I picked up a being there. It took me two weeks of confusion, endless crying, fear, and a sense I couldn't feel my heart to finally realize what was going on. I spent all day yesterday asking for this being to move to the light. It has been painful, and very confusing. I don't know how to handle this sort of thing. When I am in light, I am joyful, loving, and receive music. When I am in darkness, I am plagued by critical voices, feel exhausted, and have little hope. Do you have any thoughts for me? Many thanks, Kendall

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Dear Kendall,

In the presence of light increasing on the Earth, people are experiencing the deeper healing of tendencies that they have brought into this lifetime from the past. The tendency to abandon self or to not be able to perceive one's central identity is one such tendency - part of what you have carried over from the past into the present. This quality has made you vulnerable to the influx of other energies that have found a hospitable site to dwell in, not through your conscious intention, but through your availability. This availability is produced by the absence of strong boundaries and a strong sense of self.

This is not something to blame yourself for, dear one, as it often happens that one who is attuned to the spiritual realms takes longer to solidify and establish a well founded and well grounded sense of self. Though this is not always the case, it is not uncommon. For you, the healing of this issue is to work in all ways toward becoming more established as a self with clear boundaries, and to reject intruding energies and only allow to affect you, that which you wish.

In the past, you have not known how to say 'no' or how to stand firm within yourself. Now, the learning is to be able to stabilize your energy so that it remains clear and strong in light, and so that you do not inadvertently permit yourself to lose your boundaries. As I said, this is a problem constructed in the past, not in the present. In the present it is being healed.

If an entity or energy penetrates your energetic field that is unwanted, you must forgive yourself for that happening and also forgive the source of that energy even while you banish it from your aura. A repetitive prayer that you resonate strongly with often helps in this situation - something that you can say to connect you more completely with light and with God. A prayer/mantra such as "I am a child of the highest light. I command all that is not of that light to leave me" is useful for this purpose. Or, you can select a mantra of your own. You may also choose to separate yourself physically, temporarily, from circumstances or people where the energetic barrier is easily penetrated. Most importantly, you need to claim the right to have a self and to ask all that is not of the highest light to leave you.

Be patient, dear one. This is happening as the infusion of light into your physical body becomes stronger and as it therefore accelerates the healing of past tendencies such as this one. Let yourself believe in your own inner strength, you own inner being that is created by God, and you will find such instances of energetic penetration becoming fewer or nonexistent.

In summary, the strengthening of your inner core will do a great deal to relieve you of these difficulties, and your present experiences are helping to bring this about. Blessings, dear one, and great love. Julie Redstone